check this!

imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored
imbored imbored

all i have to say is: pure awesomeness

If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.


Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground


It is believed dinosaurs are extinct due to a giant meteor. That's true if you want to call Chuck Norris a giant meteor


Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken


Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.


Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquefy your kidneys


Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe


Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship

i have no title awesome enough for these

OMG THIS SCARES ME!

NEW MOON TRAILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OMG!!!!! NEW MOON TRAILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FEAST YOUR EYES PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!

THE TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON trailer in HD

dun dun dun

and the angels sang out in a miraculous chorus

and down from the heavens

desended Chuck Norris

who delivered a kick

that could shatter bones

into the crotch

of Indiana Jones

my dream car.....

my car would be a cooper

that is neon pink

and on top is a monster

the monster is a giant catterpillar

that is zebra striped with neon green and blue

it has wings that are purple

and antenas that shoot lasers

and many legs of steel

This is an awesome sequel to the awesome peom that i wrote

Flame Throwers and Urinals

I stand there
Waiting for my next mission
“Finish it”
And I set off

I make my way
Through waste baskets
And discarded rolls of soft, cushiony paper
Searching for the abominable bandit

I find my target
Sitting there, with so many others like it
Casually connected to the wall
So... urinal looking....

I have been assigned
To a new weapon, of mass destruction
The all mighty, all powerful...
Flame thrower

I aim
Adjusting my majestic weapon
So as to vanquish the evil once and for all
For it is the last of its kind...

I pull the trigger
Flames erupt from the end of my trident of evil
Demolishing the already rusty, collector of urine
Finalizing the immense enemy of my forefathers

I walk
triumphantly form the final resting place of foes
I hear something from behind
Something catches my eye

I turn
Raising my Spewer of Flames
What is at hand, I cannot believe
Staring into the face of all that is evil

This is an awesome poem that I wrote

Toilets and Hand Grenades

The hand grenade was in ... my hand
So hand grenade-ish
Like an over-grown green, lumpy egg
.... with ... a pin sticking out of the top

I could see the toilet in the distance
Sitting there ... all toilet-ish looking
Waiting to get waste dumped in it
Urging someone to flush it

As I look from the hand grenade, to the toilet
I realize that something must be done
Something to finalize the situation afoot
Alas!! An idea leaps to mind

I pull the pin from the hand grenade
... and stare at
Waiting to commence the deed
That has been ingrained in my soul

With a light toss
I chuck the hand grenade into the toilet
And as it lands with a soft splash
I know that I have succeeded

As I walk away from the scene of the crime
I can hear the explosion from the hand grenade
And as I walk on
A chunk of toilet lands 4 feet in front of me

I return
And as I approach my Master
“The dark deed you have requested is done Sir.”
He smiles at my success